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Emilee

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Hi, it’s been a minute, new blog post. Link in bio.
Gotta get back to Hogwarts Gotta get back to school Gotta get myself to Hogwarts Where everything is magicooooool
Mischief Managed.
I solemnly swear that I am up to no good. #leakycon #leakycon2018
Y’all, check out my friend Baileys announcement!! I’m so excited for her and super pumped to watch this series she’s a part of! #Repost @catchingbreaths with @get_repost ・・・ The concept is simple: follow someone’s journey from surgery to stage. Showing the life of a mucus mutant. Showing the life of a bilingual Deaf family. Showing the life of a dancer and @companythreesixty dancers. It technically hits all the hashtags: #spoonie #deaf #adultballerina #bodypositive #chronicillness. It hopefully connects with many communities and provides another voice in the chorus of those wanting representation in media abound. It is positive: a positive network with a positive focus wanting to counter the negative swarmy troll farm that is most modern media to date. But... what if the concept becomes a reality? What if I show not just the recovery from latest rounds of surgeries... but the pain and swelling and funk between? What if I don’t fulfill some sort of diagnostic paradigm being that I am an Atypical diagnosis (and someone who hopes not to be defined by that anyways where I can)? What if we capture not just the invigorating process of putting together a show with women I ferociously admire and protect... but also, how totally messy dance life can be? What if we showcase a family that’s equal parts Deaf as hearing... yet our variable mix of signing, reading lips, caption and speech isn’t in keeping with what the world wants from us? Choosing to share our story has come with a lot of IFs... but we are braving it none the less. Although I can’t believe our pilot episode premiered TODAY and that I can finally announce the news... fear of judgement subsists. Can perspective, positivity and living an imperfect life as openly as possible actually be of benefit? The verdict is still out... but I’m excited to try. I’m excited to see. And I’m excited to get started.▪️Click Link In Bio To Watch The Pilot Or Go To: onlygood.tv▪️#CatchingBreaths
The builders weren’t out today, so I decided to have one last hoorah in our still empty, hurricane Harvey-Ed house. They’ve finally begun repairs, and I’m super pumped for it to be fixed, but also a bit sad at the loss of the house as we knew it and how it was growing up. Here I’m in our game room, the red wall is my bathroom, and to the right is my old bedroom, where I was the night before the storm came. The bed I slept on had ceiling and insulation fallen on it the next day. Still pretty surreal almost a year out. TL;DR I love my new @sodancausa dance sneakers I got from @cinqdanceessentials ! Super pumped for the new year!

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Performance #2

I was a little nervous going into Sunday’s performance that Saturday’s was a one-and-done type of thing. That it happened and couldn’t be replicated. Thankfully, that wasn’t the case.

Warm up started us off, and for some reason my body decided it was the prime time to revolt. My stomach turned throughout the entire half hour, requiring me to awkwardly sit out many of the warm ups, especially if they involved excessive use of the abs. Thankfully, no one really asked questions, but people did stare a bit.
I made it through and did what I could. I did the turn combination with some of the more advanced girls (granted, they did multiple turns, and I kept it safe with a solid one. It’s warm up, whatever.)

I think our first performance was stronger, but number two was also a solid one. Once again, I managed the turn, and felt really good going in to the second half of the segment.

Until the music stopped.

What do we do? Do we keep going? Do we wait for it to come back? Theater in me says keep going, but what if we do and it comes back on? Then we’re off, and it’s not just me.

We all kind of waited in a moment of hesitation to decide, when it came back on. We managed to keep on time and go with the flow, and by the end of it no one seemed to remember. But still, talk about moment of panic!

The finale was a mess. I still suck at chaines turns, and almost ran into the Arabian Principal dancer. Not one of my finer moments. Whatever.

And seeing pictures of me during performance, I’m kind of cringing (not yours, Lillian. Yours are good :D) because I fear my technique isn’t as good as I tell myself it is in my head.
So. I want to try harder this next week. My old dance teacher will be out there and I want to have straight knees and lift up out of my shoe and not compromise because of nerves. I want to be better.

Yesterday was the first day I hadn’t danced in a week, and it was very sad. I love getting to do ballet every day during Nutcracker season, and have already seen improvement. I want that trend to continue, not lose it all because we don’t have class for a couple weeks.

Now I’m back to the reality that I work a full time job that is completely opposite of ballet. And it’s sad. But oh well, I guess. I’m just happy that I still get to dance when I do. How awesome is it, right?

Here’s some pictures, finally:

Annika and I back stage after the first performance

Ashley, the Clara on the first night.

Pre-show on Sunday. (Like. seriously. How awesome is this?)

Cheyenne, the Clara on the second night

Mr. Nutcracker, himself.

My friend’s daughters that came to see the show, dancing like what they saw on stage. (I mean, melt.)

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