This weekend is our last rehearsals at the down town studio.
Yesterday we ran the whole show all the way through in costume. I completely forgot about getting pictures, but it went better than I was expecting. I wasn’t sure at all how my body would handle it, and I was shaking by the time we were doing the center part of warm up.
I forced myself to keep a positive attitude. To not let my anxiety win out. I made myself take deep breaths before we went on for our first dance, hoping that it would encourage me to remember to breathe the entire dance. Apparently it worked, because I did the best I’ve done so far. It made me feel better about going into theatre week, but now I have to make sure I do the best I can to stay as healthy as I can be going into this week of long rehearsals and work deadlines and show weekend.
Honestly, I’m not letting myself think about it all. Because if I think about it all, then I realize how overwhelming everything I’m doing really is. Not to mention the pressure I feel people are putting on me to keep up with everything I have on my plate without showing any inch of wear. It’s exhausting. I can’t even let myself think about things past shows and deadlines, because if I do that I get this tightness and panic that sits in my chest and doesn’t help anything.
We’re here for another 3.5 hours. It’s our last bit of fine tuning and really getting the kinks out. Wednesday we begin rehearsals in the theater, and Friday is the school show. I won’t be in it, so I get released from rehearsal early Thursday as well.
I hope to make updates throughout, but I’m not sure if that will happen. But there will be pictures!
I hope you are all doing well!
Started ballet late October of 2011 at the age of 23.
Began pointe training late August of 2013.