As we close out on week two of post-Harvey life, friends on the other coast are on edge wondering what the next big storm will do to them, their homes, their friends and family, etc.
I was just in this lovely state last weekend, having the time of my life at Diagon Alley and Magic Kingdom.
If I went into the wonderfullness of this trip, you would be reading for quite some time. (Feel free to dm me on Instagram and I’ll tell ya all about it!) I did end up riding the Hogwarts Express with Chris Rankin, who played Percy Weasley, and who’s girlfriend also has CFS! So that was exciting comparing notes. I had seeny rheumatologist on Wednesday, the day before I left for my trip. She’s out of ideas, so I’m at a dead end again. Hearing from him that his girlfriend was having success with a treatment was a glimmer of hope I wasn’t expecting.
I also ended up being in the exact same place as Allie, one of my friends I’ve met through the Adult Ballet community on Instagram. She’s been one of my favorites from the beginning. She is so passionate, interested in many of the same things I am, (hello Taylor Swift and Dance Academy) and just seemed like someone I would get along with. Sadly, she lives in Cincinnati, which is super far from me in Texas. Not sadly, I saw she, too, would be at Disney World last weekend. Even more not sad, she text me that she would be in Disney Springs as I was literally driving there. I was SO pumped! It’s always been a silly little dream of mine to be able to meet a friend from the ballet Instagram world in real life. I’ve made so many dear friends through this that I forget I haven’t met many of them in person. Getting to actually hug Allie’s neck, see her in real life, and get pictures and Polaroids with her was such a joy, I can’t even express it. And even more so, she’s just as sweet and kind as I gathered from her account. So often people end up not being what you except, which feels like a sort of disappointment. Not with Allie.
We only have literal moments to spend together, but they were so worth it. Her cousins with her were really nice as well, and I appreciated them making our meeting happen.
Yesterday I was able to go through my old bathroom at my parents house, which was where my room was boxed and stored when my room was used as a spare bedroom. I wasn’t sure what was in there or where, so I was very anxious to get in it. It was on my list to do, but cfs was making things very difficult. Thankfully, some of my dear dance friends were able to come over yesterday and helped me go through the soggy boxes and put the stuff we could save into dry, sturdy boxes and get them out of the house in case it rains. This included my high school diploma, poetry, paintings, all my cds and even my Walkman and Discman (WOAH.) some of the poetry got wet, but Krista was able to dry it with the fan and miraculously the ink didn’t run. Some of the paintings had mold on them, but her girls were able to clean it all off and save way more of them than I expected. It was a huge weight off to have that done.
My back has been in immense pain, which seems to just get worse and worse as time goes on. It’s been escalating slowly since mid-June, and I went for an MRI before Hurricane Harvey hit. Today I was finally able to get over to the chiropractor to get the results. In short, I have arthritis in my spine, as well as two bulging disks that are hitting nerves. #coolstorybro he recommended getting them clipped, which would consist of going to San Antonio at least twice, but would be an outpatient procedure.
My chiropractor looked at me and said “how are you not in terrible pain? Most people would be screaming. This is no small thing and it’s definitely not in your head.” I just said, “I mean, it hurts?”
I can’t drive myself because hi back pain. And I’ve had family say “shotgun not it” about taking me, but had three friends so far offer to take me without me even asking. Like. Things suck and they seem to keep piling on with all these little things that I can just ignore or push through, but I’m still not left high and dry even in all this mess.
I don’t know what I did to deserve having such incredible people in my life, but I’m not complaining. It’s literally everything. People tell me I’m strong or I’m so brave or whatever, but really it’s not me. It’s the people I have beside me. I’m nothing without them. Literally nothing.
I taught my 5/6 year olds yesterday and had two assistants. Thank God. I literally couldn’t have done it without them. Like at this point, I can’t sit with my legs out in front of me without terrible pain. 5/6 year olds don’t care. (I mean they’re precious little nuggets but they’re also tiny little nuggets.) my assistants are able to just jump in and get stuff done and the girls love it. It’s a huge weight off my shoulders.
Friends are everything. Friends are literally family. Friends are so important. I hope you have friends. If you need a friend, I hope you reach out, or if not I hope someone reaches out to you. And if you want to, dm me on Instagram or comment here and I’ll be your friend! Seriously. Do it. I’m an introvert but I love people.
I hope you all are well. I hope you all are safe. I’m praying for everyone in the line of wildfires, hurricanes, hate, and oppression. I’m praying for you. ❤️