It doesn’t feel like it can possibly be mid-August already. That some schools are already back in session and others start back next week. Where did time go? What have I done with my life?!
I was a little nervous for yesterday’s class. Not so much as I normally would be since I knew most of the adults from summer, but more so since I haven’t taken a “normal” adult ballet class and I wasn’t quite sure what to expect. I’ve watched a few adult classes before, and usually there’s a pretty good amount of students. Yesterday, I was one of 6.
I had watched a bit of the V’s class before ours, curious as to who all was taking it and how many there were. (The class of IV’s that just moved up is HUGE. which is pretty cool, honestly. That so many of them are sticking with it.) I didn’t notice any VI’s in the class and only noticed four returning V’s and there were so many students they had to pull out an extra barre. The teacher is new for this level this year, and it seems like it’s going to be a great year. I’m excited for them. I considered taking it since I’ll be there early anyway, and I’m taking the V’s Wednesday between classes, but didn’t register for it. Still indecisive.
I’ve had a good past couple of days healthwise, which was a pleasant surprise. Mix that with the quaint class size and it made for one of the best classes I’ve had in a while. Mrs Alex taught, and I was able to be at a barre where I could see myself in the mirror without having to look through other people at the barre in front of the mirror (which is when I usually give up using the mirror at all) and was able to really see where I am versus where I need to be. The pace for adult is wonderful for finding where you need to be down to the detail and perfecting it, so I was able to get the feel for new head placements I hadn’t fully understood before and really using the upper body. I still need work, but yesterday just felt so good. It also wasn’t too bad on my knees, and the pace helped me be able to find where square is, even though it isn’t a natural position for me, and work the muscles to try and maintain square hips throughout combinations. It’s amazing how much more you can do when your hips are simply square. I was able to work on centering myself and really using my core. I felt like I was on top of the world, like I was really getting somewhere.
After class, I tried on my new size 40 Russian Pointe Rubin’s to see how they do when my feet are warm, and they were great. The elastics are a bit loose, but I can fix that. I tried a pirouette on each side, just to see the feel of it, and they actually weren’t terrible. One of my friends who takes class with the principal dancers even said that they looked really solid and my balance in them looked good. That was so great to hear and honestly it was probably the best I’ve ever done turns. (Now to further work on my ankle flexibility, my spot, and getting my leg to a higher passé.)
I left class feeling alive and enlightened. Like I have a new hope that I can still learn and grow. That I’m not finished or hopeless.
I was woken up this morning by stomach pains, which have been with me all morning. I’ll spare you the details, but I feel like all those good days I had this weekend have come back to bite me all at once. Maybe it was the core use yesterday getting back at me today, but dang I’m in pain and wiped out after hardly doing a thing. I’m going to try and push through anyway to maintain the regimin I have made for myself to try and get stronger. I realize I can’t do everything I wish I could do, but if I just start where I am and make a habit of it, I’ll see results in time. I can’t give up.
I think it helps that the Olympics are going on right now as well. They give me hope. You see these athletes that no one expect to even get into the finals walk away with gold medals. Just because you aren’t what’s deemed “the best” doesn’t mean all hope is lost.
And you never see someone just give up. Even if they mess up terribly or know they don’t have the start value to win, they go out there and do their best and are so proud of themselves. That’s how it should be. That’s inspiring.
Do your best where you are with what you have. That is the formula for success.