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Mischief Managed.
I solemnly swear that I am up to no good. #leakycon #leakycon2018
Y’all, check out my friend Baileys announcement!! I’m so excited for her and super pumped to watch this series she’s a part of! #Repost @catchingbreaths with @get_repost ・・・ The concept is simple: follow someone’s journey from surgery to stage. Showing the life of a mucus mutant. Showing the life of a bilingual Deaf family. Showing the life of a dancer and @companythreesixty dancers. It technically hits all the hashtags: #spoonie #deaf #adultballerina #bodypositive #chronicillness. It hopefully connects with many communities and provides another voice in the chorus of those wanting representation in media abound. It is positive: a positive network with a positive focus wanting to counter the negative swarmy troll farm that is most modern media to date. But... what if the concept becomes a reality? What if I show not just the recovery from latest rounds of surgeries... but the pain and swelling and funk between? What if I don’t fulfill some sort of diagnostic paradigm being that I am an Atypical diagnosis (and someone who hopes not to be defined by that anyways where I can)? What if we capture not just the invigorating process of putting together a show with women I ferociously admire and protect... but also, how totally messy dance life can be? What if we showcase a family that’s equal parts Deaf as hearing... yet our variable mix of signing, reading lips, caption and speech isn’t in keeping with what the world wants from us? Choosing to share our story has come with a lot of IFs... but we are braving it none the less. Although I can’t believe our pilot episode premiered TODAY and that I can finally announce the news... fear of judgement subsists. Can perspective, positivity and living an imperfect life as openly as possible actually be of benefit? The verdict is still out... but I’m excited to try. I’m excited to see. And I’m excited to get started.▪️Click Link In Bio To Watch The Pilot Or Go To:▪️#CatchingBreaths
The builders weren’t out today, so I decided to have one last hoorah in our still empty, hurricane Harvey-Ed house. They’ve finally begun repairs, and I’m super pumped for it to be fixed, but also a bit sad at the loss of the house as we knew it and how it was growing up. Here I’m in our game room, the red wall is my bathroom, and to the right is my old bedroom, where I was the night before the storm came. The bed I slept on had ceiling and insulation fallen on it the next day. Still pretty surreal almost a year out. TL;DR I love my new @sodancausa dance sneakers I got from @cinqdanceessentials ! Super pumped for the new year!
We had a guest teacher in class last night. I wrote a blog post about it! Link is in the bio. (Spoiler. It was wonderful.) Thank you so much, @linds779 for teaching us! (Ps. My shirt is from @balletlibrarian ‘s book Cantique, you can totally still get ya one. It’s my favorite, obviously.) PD: photo of me and Lindsi Dec from Pacific Northwest Ballet after class.
Once upon a time, my toes used to touch the floor.

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Selena Week, Night 4

We had our last full dress rehearsal last night. 

After the school show, I took my friend Lillian home, called my family and told them about becoming a swan, and picked up my friend Annika to get lunch and do some running around. We came back to her house to just hang out with the rest of the time we had. I fell asleep, which almost never happens during the day, and woke up a bit confused and nauseous. (Which is why I don’t typically sleep during the day.) 

We get to rehearsal and my dressing room is locked. I go in with the swans until they get it unlocked and realized I couldn’t find my flat shoes. I thought I had put them in my bag, but they weren’t there, so I assumed they were in the dressing room. It wasn’t unlocked before warm up, so I went down with only one shoe on. Mrs Alex noticed and asked and I just said, “well, you see” and she laughed, knowing it was a story. 

After warm up, the dressing room was unlocked and my shoes weren’t there. Thankfully I don’t need them for the show, so I just kept going and figured I’d worry about it later. 

I put on my make up and sprayed my hair and got everything ready for the quick change them got my costume on for Act I. I set my hat on top of the shelf in the hallway where my costume was and realized something else was up there–my shoes. Mystery solved! I swear I keep losing parts of my brain, seeing as I completely forgot my pointe shoes in the green room the night before and didn’t even think that they may be missing until I was driving over the next day. Thankfully, they were there and I apologized to Mrs Jane. Then laughed to myself at how spacey I can be sometimes. 

At warm up, we found out one of the other swans had to drop due to injury, so another ugly duckling became a swan. 

I was really proud of the remains covers. They have had a really great attitude, when it could be so easy to become bitter. One in particular who had been the cover for the part that came open to needing someone and didn’t get picked. I knew it’d be a tough blow for her and my mheart went out to her and I was curious to see how she’d react, on guard with words of encouragement and empathy should they be needed. 

When it came time for quick change, I ran into the green room towards where my costume was set out and immediately feel hands starting to undo my costume for me. I had no idea who it was as Mrs Jane was on the other side of the room. It was the very girl who wasn’t picked to be the cover for the swan, among all the swans, doing what she could to help us get on stage for the role she worked for and didn’t get to do. 

Her level of maturity impressed me substantially. She got out ten swans in time for the second Act single handedly, was on guard with pins and anything else we’d need, and even after Act II, was willing to help with anything needed. 

And that, ladies and gentleman, is how to be a cover. You work hard, even though you might not get it. And when people get the part and you don’t, obviously being a bit disappointing a second time around, you do your best to help where you can and are needed. You do the parts you are cast for with a great attitude and with professionalism. 

I am so proud. Proud isn’t even an adequate enough word. 

We did the show and got corrections. After warm up today, we’re gonna run Act II to help us two that are in new places, which I’m grateful for. There’s still a few parts that I’m a little rusty on, but the girls have been so helpful to me. 

I noticed yesterday that the more I do the part, the easier all the standing gets. It still hurts like crazy, but way less than the beginning of the week. I hardly needed to use my distraction techniques. 

My left shoe seems to be giving me trouble. It seems that the shank sways, which I’ve been told will always happen and I just have to learn to deal with, twisting my foot awkwardly into the shoe and making things a bit more difficult. I’m hoping to get to road trip up to Austin sometime back to the Capezio store I order my shoes through and see what they think. I’m not sure if there’s a way to get that shoe a little smaller or what use need to do. It’s on my shorter let and my smaller foot, but I don’t know if it’s small enough to warrant a half size down or if it’d make things worse. Regardless, I’m grateful this part is feeing better, especially since the first show is tonight. 

I’m also incredibly grateful for all the other dancers who have been so kind and helpful to me throughout this show. It’s been a pretty emotional time, and stressful at points, but honestly, it’s made me a better person. I’ve learned and I’ve grown and I’ve improved, even if I still feel a bit behind. I have to take into consideration the fact that I’m just now doing one set part, and if I had done one consistently, I more than likely wouldn’t be struggling so much at this point in the game. But even so, parts I’ve messed up have been improved. I know I still have more to improve and only the spontaneous rehearsal to fix them all before the show, but I’m gonna do my best to use it and get that much better. 

I need to take more pictures. Fail me. 

(The top is from the meet and greet, compliments of the dance moms)

This entry was posted in dance.

2 comments on “Selena Week, Night 4

  1. Wow it looks amazing! Nice costumes 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you! Our costume department is top notch!


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